The Mayor of Sugar Land, Texas was robbed in his own driveway after a city council meeting...
- source chron.com
Just a sign of the times...
PC
Showing posts with label warcession. Show all posts
Showing posts with label warcession. Show all posts
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Friday, June 19, 2009
Comfort Wipes, Innovative Asswiping
Keeping the toilet humor going, here is a REAL AD for a product called Comfort Wipe...
"The first improvement to toilet paper as we know it since the 1880s"
"The Comfort Wipe, allows you to maintain your dignity, while you maintain your personal hygiene."
God help us,
PC
"The first improvement to toilet paper as we know it since the 1880s"
"The Comfort Wipe, allows you to maintain your dignity, while you maintain your personal hygiene."
God help us,
PC
Tuesday, June 09, 2009
Jeff Macke May Leave CNBC
After watching this, we should have seen it coming..
If you leave, you will be missed Jeff...
You crazy bastard.
PC
If you leave, you will be missed Jeff...
You crazy bastard.
PC
Friday, May 29, 2009
Mr. Alan's and Mark have your back!
In this warcession we need deals like 1 for $29 or 2 for $50, 10 bucks!
This may be the best Ad campaign ever!
If you can't get credit at Norton Furniture, you can't get it anywhere...
Mark creeps me out...
This one has a surprise ending...
Mark takes his message to the streets...
And now an even worse AD:
I hope that was stupid and/or random enough,
PC
This may be the best Ad campaign ever!
If you can't get credit at Norton Furniture, you can't get it anywhere...
Mark creeps me out...
This one has a surprise ending...
Mark takes his message to the streets...
And now an even worse AD:
I hope that was stupid and/or random enough,
PC
Friday, May 22, 2009
Integriti's Special Invitation
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Title: Your special invitation...
So i opened the mail yesterday and found something that belongs here. During the worst recession of our generation I recieve a special invitation from Visa. For a low low price of $495 per year I could own a patent pending carbon fiber black credit card! Are you kidding me Visa? Where is Ashton at? Oh, I know where he is, buried under billions in bad debt like the rest of us. Visa die.
- Integriti
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---------------------------------------------
Sounds like a sweet deal.
PC
Wednesday, May 06, 2009
Technology Wars (3D Realms Death)
3D Realms Shuts Down
In what can only be described as the worst corporate failure since Lehman Brothers, 3D Realms has shut down operations. For 13 years I had been waiting for my favorite first person shooter Duke Nukem 3D's sequel. Duke Nukem Forever was given a WID release date. WID stood for when its done. Apparently WID now means never. The stock market has responded terribly. Nasdaq down 3%, S&P 500 struggling to stay above 900, and the Dow Jones selling off 150 points! The systematic risk of a 3D Realms failure and the ensuing instability in all of gaming has shook the global economy to its core. Oil shot up to $58 in what can only be described as a flight to quality. The US Treasury had to issue 30 year bonds at the highest yield since the current warcession hit. Desperate times call for desperate measures. We must bailout 3D Realms, or at the very least Duke Nukem Forever. Unless we want the deflationary spiral to continue, Congress and the Obama Administration must act swiftly and with no accountability. Do we need to revisit the days after the fall of Fannie, Freddie, AIG, Bear Stearns, Lehman, Washington Mutual, and Circuit City? Or do we do things differently? A world without Duke Nukem is a sad shell of existence. Public health care can be put on the back burner, but this cannot wait. We have never faced the kind of volatility that the unmet expected release of DNF will cause. Forget the S&P 500 going to 666 again, we would be heading below 500. Apple would collapse and Microsoft would start making pancakes instead of software. Do we really want to see this world? I sure as shit don't and I would ask all citizens to unite with me in demanding a bailout of 3D Realms to allow Duke Nukem Forever to be released. The government could take an ownership interest that would allow for capital appreciation to flow through to taxpayers. This is bigger than any other crisis we have faced.
God help us,
Productive Citizen
To soften the devastating blow of this news I have provided a remix of the Duke Nukem 3D Theme Song. Hopefully this will prevent some of the inevitable suicides.
Farewell Duke.mp3
In what can only be described as the worst corporate failure since Lehman Brothers, 3D Realms has shut down operations. For 13 years I had been waiting for my favorite first person shooter Duke Nukem 3D's sequel. Duke Nukem Forever was given a WID release date. WID stood for when its done. Apparently WID now means never. The stock market has responded terribly. Nasdaq down 3%, S&P 500 struggling to stay above 900, and the Dow Jones selling off 150 points! The systematic risk of a 3D Realms failure and the ensuing instability in all of gaming has shook the global economy to its core. Oil shot up to $58 in what can only be described as a flight to quality. The US Treasury had to issue 30 year bonds at the highest yield since the current warcession hit. Desperate times call for desperate measures. We must bailout 3D Realms, or at the very least Duke Nukem Forever. Unless we want the deflationary spiral to continue, Congress and the Obama Administration must act swiftly and with no accountability. Do we need to revisit the days after the fall of Fannie, Freddie, AIG, Bear Stearns, Lehman, Washington Mutual, and Circuit City? Or do we do things differently? A world without Duke Nukem is a sad shell of existence. Public health care can be put on the back burner, but this cannot wait. We have never faced the kind of volatility that the unmet expected release of DNF will cause. Forget the S&P 500 going to 666 again, we would be heading below 500. Apple would collapse and Microsoft would start making pancakes instead of software. Do we really want to see this world? I sure as shit don't and I would ask all citizens to unite with me in demanding a bailout of 3D Realms to allow Duke Nukem Forever to be released. The government could take an ownership interest that would allow for capital appreciation to flow through to taxpayers. This is bigger than any other crisis we have faced.
God help us,
Productive Citizen
To soften the devastating blow of this news I have provided a remix of the Duke Nukem 3D Theme Song. Hopefully this will prevent some of the inevitable suicides.
Farewell Duke.mp3
Tuesday, May 05, 2009
Ohio, at least we have LeBron James
First some videos about the bustling metropolis of Cleveland, Ohio
Hastily Made Cleveland Tourism Video: 1st Attempt
Hastily Made Cleveland Tourism Video: 2nd Attempt
Now some videos about the caped crusader of Cincinnati, Ohio. SHADOWHARE!
Cincinnati's Masked Super Hero: Part 1
Cincinnati's Masked Super Hero: Part 2
More info about Shadowhare available here.
View our comments for the copy of an online chat session with Shadowhare...
In other news LeBron James was named MVP of the NBA. He is the first Cavalier to receive this honor and he accepted the award at his highschool, St. Vincent-St. Mary, in Akron, Ohio. Go Cavs!
LeBron shows that even in a state with very little opportunity, a valuable person can be born and succeed. His work is not over. 12 more wins!
PC
Hastily Made Cleveland Tourism Video: 1st Attempt
Hastily Made Cleveland Tourism Video: 2nd Attempt
Now some videos about the caped crusader of Cincinnati, Ohio. SHADOWHARE!
Cincinnati's Masked Super Hero: Part 1
Cincinnati's Masked Super Hero: Part 2
More info about Shadowhare available here.
View our comments for the copy of an online chat session with Shadowhare...
In other news LeBron James was named MVP of the NBA. He is the first Cavalier to receive this honor and he accepted the award at his highschool, St. Vincent-St. Mary, in Akron, Ohio. Go Cavs!
LeBron shows that even in a state with very little opportunity, a valuable person can be born and succeed. His work is not over. 12 more wins!
PC
Friday, April 10, 2009
Teabag the White House and Kanye's Sad
Huge Heap of Stupidity Today...
First Teabagging the White House:
Next, Kanye's illiterate blog post about South Park shitting all over him.
"SOUTH PARK MURDERED ME LAST NIGHT AND IT'S PRETTY FUNNY. IT HURTS MY FEELINGS BUT WHAT CAN YOU EXPECT FROM SOUTH PARK! I ACTUALLY HAVE BEEN WORKING ON MY EGO THOUGH. HAVING THE CRAZY EGO IS PLAYED OUT AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE AND CAREER. I USE TO USE IT TO BUILD UP MY ESTEEM WHEN NOBODY BELIEVED IN ME. NOW THAT PEOPLE DO BELIEVE AND SUPPORT MY MUSIC AND PRODUCTS THE BEST RESPONSE IS THANK YOU INSTEAD OF "I TOLD YOU SO!!!" IT'S COOL TO TALK SHIT WHEN YOU'RE RAPPING BUT NOT IN REAL LIFE. WHEN YOU MEET LITTLE WAYNE IN PERSON HE'S THE NICEST GUY FOR EXAMPLE. I JUST WANNA BE A DOPER PERSON WHICH STARTS WITH ME NOT ALWAYS TELLING PEOPLE HOW DOPE I THINK I AM. I NEED TO JUST GET PAST MYSELF. DROP THE BRAVADO AND JUST MAKE DOPE PRODUCT. EVERYTHING IS NOT THAT SERIOUS. AS LONG AS PEOPLE THINK I ACT LIKE A BITCH THIS TYPE OF SHIT WILL HAPPEN TO ME. I GOT A LONG ROAD AHEAD OF ME TO MAKE PEOPLE BELIEVE I'M NOT ACTUALLY A HUGE DOUCHE BUT I'M UP FOR THE CHALLENGE. I'M SURE THE WRITERS AT SOUTH PARK ARE REALLY NICE PEOPLE IN REAL LIFE. THANKS FOR TAKING THE TIME TO DRAW MY CREW. THAT WAS PRETTY FUNNY ALSO!! I'M SURE THERE'S GRAMMATICAL ERRORS IN THIS... THAT'S HOW YOU KNOW IT'S ME!" - Kanye West's Blog 4/09/09
Download the Gay Fish Song here.
Video Here:
You morons are making it way too easy to blog about random stupidity. Thank you, Matt and Trey of South Park. You guys are my heros. Between this episode and Margaritaville, you have shown me that there is still a small bit of humanity that can appreciate intelligent art and satire. Although most of our generation is hooked on meth...
Stay tuned for new beats from AOT,
PC
First Teabagging the White House:
Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy
Next, Kanye's illiterate blog post about South Park shitting all over him.
"SOUTH PARK MURDERED ME LAST NIGHT AND IT'S PRETTY FUNNY. IT HURTS MY FEELINGS BUT WHAT CAN YOU EXPECT FROM SOUTH PARK! I ACTUALLY HAVE BEEN WORKING ON MY EGO THOUGH. HAVING THE CRAZY EGO IS PLAYED OUT AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE AND CAREER. I USE TO USE IT TO BUILD UP MY ESTEEM WHEN NOBODY BELIEVED IN ME. NOW THAT PEOPLE DO BELIEVE AND SUPPORT MY MUSIC AND PRODUCTS THE BEST RESPONSE IS THANK YOU INSTEAD OF "I TOLD YOU SO!!!" IT'S COOL TO TALK SHIT WHEN YOU'RE RAPPING BUT NOT IN REAL LIFE. WHEN YOU MEET LITTLE WAYNE IN PERSON HE'S THE NICEST GUY FOR EXAMPLE. I JUST WANNA BE A DOPER PERSON WHICH STARTS WITH ME NOT ALWAYS TELLING PEOPLE HOW DOPE I THINK I AM. I NEED TO JUST GET PAST MYSELF. DROP THE BRAVADO AND JUST MAKE DOPE PRODUCT. EVERYTHING IS NOT THAT SERIOUS. AS LONG AS PEOPLE THINK I ACT LIKE A BITCH THIS TYPE OF SHIT WILL HAPPEN TO ME. I GOT A LONG ROAD AHEAD OF ME TO MAKE PEOPLE BELIEVE I'M NOT ACTUALLY A HUGE DOUCHE BUT I'M UP FOR THE CHALLENGE. I'M SURE THE WRITERS AT SOUTH PARK ARE REALLY NICE PEOPLE IN REAL LIFE. THANKS FOR TAKING THE TIME TO DRAW MY CREW. THAT WAS PRETTY FUNNY ALSO!! I'M SURE THERE'S GRAMMATICAL ERRORS IN THIS... THAT'S HOW YOU KNOW IT'S ME!" - Kanye West's Blog 4/09/09
Download the Gay Fish Song here.
Video Here:
You morons are making it way too easy to blog about random stupidity. Thank you, Matt and Trey of South Park. You guys are my heros. Between this episode and Margaritaville, you have shown me that there is still a small bit of humanity that can appreciate intelligent art and satire. Although most of our generation is hooked on meth...
Stay tuned for new beats from AOT,
PC
Monday, April 06, 2009
Cramer "Answers" My Email
A few weeks ago I sent an email to Jim Cramer about Sears (SHLD)
Gotta love his answer, Sears credit line is strong?
If I am right, I expect him to hand me over the show.
I would add some better sound buttons:
"It's garbage"
"Fuck You"
"I believe, strongly, that Gears of War will lead us out of the recession"
"Sears!"
"Work Sucks Deek!"
"Warcession!"
"Warflation!"
"I would rather own Sears"
Now that show would rock...
Although it would have to air after 10 PM,
I am available Comedy Central...
PC
Full Disclosure:
I own $2.50 and $20 strike puts on Sears in September 2009.
Gotta love his answer, Sears credit line is strong?
If I am right, I expect him to hand me over the show.
I would add some better sound buttons:
"It's garbage"
"Fuck You"
"I believe, strongly, that Gears of War will lead us out of the recession"
"Sears!"
"Work Sucks Deek!"
"Warcession!"
"Warflation!"
"I would rather own Sears"
Now that show would rock...
Although it would have to air after 10 PM,
I am available Comedy Central...
PC
Full Disclosure:
I own $2.50 and $20 strike puts on Sears in September 2009.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Jon Stewart vs Jim Cramer
Please watch Jon Stewart mop the floor with Jim Cramer...
Random Stupidity?
Yes.
Corruption will continue to provide us with fantastic material.
BTW, Check out AOT's song
United Banks of America (52 Week Low Mix)
to get our take on the problems plaguing the banks.
May Gears bless us,
and the may Gears bless the
United Banks of America!
PC
Random Stupidity?
Yes.
Corruption will continue to provide us with fantastic material.
BTW, Check out AOT's song
United Banks of America (52 Week Low Mix)
to get our take on the problems plaguing the banks.
May Gears bless us,
and the may Gears bless the
United Banks of America!
PC
Saturday, February 21, 2009
United Banks of America (52WeekLowMix)
Greetings,
As you all know, we are in the worst recession since 1937.
The situation is dire.
Banks are trading for less than Starbucks.
AOT has rushed here to save the financial system.
Our plan will follow in the coming weeks.
We are still hammering out most of the details.
Let me assure you, this new plan is good.
It's just not done yet.
So we'll get back to you when it is done.
In the meantime, please listen to our new song:
United Banks of America (52 Week Low Mix)
We have provided an approximation of the lyrics:
I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United Banks of America
Fannie, Freddie, AIG
Where do they get the authority?
Wells Fargo, Bank of America
JP Morgan Stanley and Chase
WAMU, Countrywide, IndyMac
OH NO!
It's the Super Lehman Brothers
Riding on the back of the Meryll Lynch bull
Bear Stearns knocked the bull on its ass
shorting stocks like Douglas Kass
Whenever I make money, somebody loses money!
SRS
SKF
SSG
QID
SDS
DXD
If I'm gonna make money, somebody loses money!
I want a million dollars
You want a million dollars
Let's spend a trillion dollars
OH NO!
Pelosi, Reed and Barney Frank
Love the Fed more than you and me
George Bush and Henry Paulson
spent all our currency
The former head of the New York Fed is now in charge of the IRS
Tim Geithner takes your taxes
but he doesn't pay his own
you don't need an RTC
all you need is AOT
Peaceful Resolution
Peaceful Revolution
a revolution without dancing is not a revolution worth having.
This ain't a bad bank
it's a citi bank
this aint a bad bank
it's a shitty bank
SRS
SKF
SSG
QID
SDS
DXD
I only make money, if someone loses money!
------------------------------------------------------------
We can only hope this will create a more open dialogue about what is really going on in the world economy.
PC
As you all know, we are in the worst recession since 1937.
The situation is dire.
Banks are trading for less than Starbucks.
AOT has rushed here to save the financial system.
Our plan will follow in the coming weeks.
We are still hammering out most of the details.
Let me assure you, this new plan is good.
It's just not done yet.
So we'll get back to you when it is done.
In the meantime, please listen to our new song:
United Banks of America (52 Week Low Mix)
We have provided an approximation of the lyrics:
I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United Banks of America
Fannie, Freddie, AIG
Where do they get the authority?
Wells Fargo, Bank of America
JP Morgan Stanley and Chase
WAMU, Countrywide, IndyMac
OH NO!
It's the Super Lehman Brothers
Riding on the back of the Meryll Lynch bull
Bear Stearns knocked the bull on its ass
shorting stocks like Douglas Kass
Whenever I make money, somebody loses money!
SRS
SKF
SSG
QID
SDS
DXD
If I'm gonna make money, somebody loses money!
I want a million dollars
You want a million dollars
Let's spend a trillion dollars
OH NO!
Pelosi, Reed and Barney Frank
Love the Fed more than you and me
George Bush and Henry Paulson
spent all our currency
The former head of the New York Fed is now in charge of the IRS
Tim Geithner takes your taxes
but he doesn't pay his own
you don't need an RTC
all you need is AOT
Peaceful Resolution
Peaceful Revolution
a revolution without dancing is not a revolution worth having.
This ain't a bad bank
it's a citi bank
this aint a bad bank
it's a shitty bank
SRS
SKF
SSG
QID
SDS
DXD
I only make money, if someone loses money!
------------------------------------------------------------
We can only hope this will create a more open dialogue about what is really going on in the world economy.
PC
Friday, January 16, 2009
Deflation, Inflation, Oil, and Spacebucks
So we obviously are in the worst recession since Jesus led a hummus strike in Palestine. While playing Gears of War 2 last night, a problem arose. My friend did not have the new "combustible map pack." We suggested that he buy them with his xbox live points. He pointed out that his points were on his other account and that he didn't know if they could be transferred or traded to his present account. This lead us to a revelation. We should created a currency market for videogame points. The Spacebucks exchange would be a place where wii, xbox and ps3 "spacebucks" could be traded in exchange for each other as well as US Dollars. If we could take out insurance on the value our spacebucks, we could hedge against inflation or deflation (even finance home purchases.) This market would be obviously more transparent than any other financial market. As a result of the transparency, spacebucks would be worth more than the US Dollar relative to the videogame currencies. Also, we may as well throw a conversion rate for WoW gold and CnC Tiberium to spacebucks as well. So right now, the $10 gets you 800 xbox points, well 7 spacebucks would get the same amount. Seems like a no brainer. The dollar will ultimately crash, but spacebucks will have the same purchasing power, a win win for the gamers and the game companies. We could start buying actual commodities in spacebucks, a stable currency would create less volatility in the actual gold and oil markets. Lastly, the money supplies can be controlled by the central banks of Nintendo and Microsoft. Sony's damn near insolvent, so they would be a lot like the Iceland of the spacebucks exchange. Videogame companies have less debt than the federal reserve and the central banks across the world, so this could lead to broader stability in the markets. So let us write to congress as well as our facefudge pals, our mayonnaisespace compatriots, and twitter our way out of this recession. May Gears bless us, and may Gears bless this United Spacebucks of America.
www.technosucks.com
PC
www.technosucks.com
PC
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