Check out the latest innovation from Qualcomm...
Also, Kodak is joining in the fun.
Also, Red Faction's Ostrich Hammer
True random stupidity.
In other news, AOT has received
competing bids from Microsoft, Google and Apple.
April Fools,
PC
Wednesday, April 01, 2009
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Post #100: The 5000 Calorie Burger
Source CNBC
In what is the epitome of stupidity, the Fifth Third Burger!
Fifth Third Burger "Nutritional" Value
Calories: 4889
Total Fat: 299g
Sat. Fat: 199g
Cholesterol: 744mg
Sodium: 10,887mg
Total Carbs: 354g
Protein: 198g
Congratulations to the Western Michigan Wildcats, who play at Fifth Third Bank Ballpark, for creating the most disgusting thing humans can eat. It's 5/3 lbs of beef with lettuce, tomato, salsa, sour cream, chili and Fritos on an eight-inch sesame seed bun. The team says it feeds one to four people and sells for $20, and if a person finishes the Fifth Third Burger in one sitting, the team will offer up a Fifth Third Burger T-shirt. Now you could either have 8 shares of Fifth Third Bank, or one of these burgers.
Either choice is probably a waste of money...
Wow, 100 posts... Here's to 100 more!
PC
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
China Hates Google
China Blocks YouTube, Calls Tibet Beating Video 'Lies'
source CNBC
China on Tuesday accused supporters of the Dalai Lama of fabricating a video that appears to show police beating a Tibetan protester to death, while the video-sharing network YouTube said its service had been blocked for Chinese users.
The footage, which the official Xinhua News Agency said came from sources tied to the Dalai Lama's government-in-exile, was pieced together from different places, the agency said Tuesday, citing an unidentified official with China's Tibetan regional government.
t was not clear what video Xinhua was referring to or where it was available, but YouTube owner Google [GOOG 347.05 -1.55 (-0.44%) ] said that the file-sharing site had been blocked in China. Google spokesman Scott Rubin said in an e-mail to The Associated Press that the company was pushing to have service restored and that it could not comment on the Chinese government's reason for the block.
China occasionally blocks the file YouTube to prevent access to videos that criticize or shine an unflattering light on its Tibet policies.
The footage, which the Xinhua said came from sources tied to the Dalai Lama's government-in-exile, was pieced together from different places, the agency said Tuesday, citing an unidentified official with China's Tibetan regional government.
Few details were given, although the report said the footage purported to show a person named Tendar being beaten to death by police following a riot in Tibet's capital Lhasa on March 14 last year. Xinhua said the person in the footage was not in fact Tendar and wounds shown were fake.
"The Dalai Lama group is used to fabricating lies to deceive the international community and the aim of this video is to hide the truth of the March 14th riot," Xinhua quoted the official as saying.
The government did not directly address whether YouTube had been blocked. When asked about the matter, Foreign Ministry spokesman Qin Gang told reporters: "Many people have a false impression that the Chinese government fears the Internet. In fact it is just the opposite."
Users in Beijing said they were unable to access the site late Tuesday.
Security in Tibetan areas of China has been tightened in recent weeks as Beijing seeks to head off trouble related to sensitive anniversaries this month. March 14 marked the one-year anniversary of anti-government riots in Lhasa, Tibet's regional capital, while March 17 marked 50 years since the Dalai Lama escaped into exile in India after Chinese troops crushed a Tibetan uprising.
Armed police have been patrolling a Tibetan community in northwest China following reports that six people were arrested after a crowd of hundreds—including Buddhist monks—attacked a police station.
-----------------------------------------------------
In our attempts to piss off China, here is the banned video...
Now we are not trying to be preachy, but it is apparent that the Chinese people need someone to show them the brighter side of the internet. In an attempt to lighten the mood, here is a randomly stupid game about boobs...
Lust for Bust
Click here to play this game
Changing the world, one boob at a time...
PC
source CNBC
China on Tuesday accused supporters of the Dalai Lama of fabricating a video that appears to show police beating a Tibetan protester to death, while the video-sharing network YouTube said its service had been blocked for Chinese users.
The footage, which the official Xinhua News Agency said came from sources tied to the Dalai Lama's government-in-exile, was pieced together from different places, the agency said Tuesday, citing an unidentified official with China's Tibetan regional government.
t was not clear what video Xinhua was referring to or where it was available, but YouTube owner Google [GOOG 347.05 -1.55 (-0.44%) ] said that the file-sharing site had been blocked in China. Google spokesman Scott Rubin said in an e-mail to The Associated Press that the company was pushing to have service restored and that it could not comment on the Chinese government's reason for the block.
China occasionally blocks the file YouTube to prevent access to videos that criticize or shine an unflattering light on its Tibet policies.
The footage, which the Xinhua said came from sources tied to the Dalai Lama's government-in-exile, was pieced together from different places, the agency said Tuesday, citing an unidentified official with China's Tibetan regional government.
Few details were given, although the report said the footage purported to show a person named Tendar being beaten to death by police following a riot in Tibet's capital Lhasa on March 14 last year. Xinhua said the person in the footage was not in fact Tendar and wounds shown were fake.
"The Dalai Lama group is used to fabricating lies to deceive the international community and the aim of this video is to hide the truth of the March 14th riot," Xinhua quoted the official as saying.
The government did not directly address whether YouTube had been blocked. When asked about the matter, Foreign Ministry spokesman Qin Gang told reporters: "Many people have a false impression that the Chinese government fears the Internet. In fact it is just the opposite."
Users in Beijing said they were unable to access the site late Tuesday.
Security in Tibetan areas of China has been tightened in recent weeks as Beijing seeks to head off trouble related to sensitive anniversaries this month. March 14 marked the one-year anniversary of anti-government riots in Lhasa, Tibet's regional capital, while March 17 marked 50 years since the Dalai Lama escaped into exile in India after Chinese troops crushed a Tibetan uprising.
Armed police have been patrolling a Tibetan community in northwest China following reports that six people were arrested after a crowd of hundreds—including Buddhist monks—attacked a police station.
-----------------------------------------------------
In our attempts to piss off China, here is the banned video...
Now we are not trying to be preachy, but it is apparent that the Chinese people need someone to show them the brighter side of the internet. In an attempt to lighten the mood, here is a randomly stupid game about boobs...
Lust for Bust
Click here to play this game
Changing the world, one boob at a time...
PC
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Larry Kudlow Should Go To Jail
Larry Kudlow seen here on CNBC burning a dollar to demonstrate the effect of new Fed monetary policies:
This is a violation of Title 18, Section 333, of the United States Code. Title 18, Section 333, states: "Whoever mutilates, cuts, defaces, disfigures, or perforates, or unites or cements together, or does any other thing to any bank bill, draft, note, or other evidence of debt issued by any national banking association, or Federal Reserve bank, or the Federal Reserve System, with intent to render such bank bill, draft, note, or other evidence of debt unfit to be reissued, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than six months, or both."
I sent an email to CNBC asking for Mr. Kudlow to at least pay the $100 fine. How arrogant can one man be? To burn a dollar during the peak of the worst recession since the 1930s disgusts me in a way similar to our previous post about Jim Cramer. These CNBC elitists have no idea what the common man is going through in America. Better ways to use that burnt dollar bill? Give it to a homeless person, donate it to charity, even roll it up to enjoy some of the nose candy that Kudlow was once addicted to... CNBC is resorting to classless antics that I thought were only reserved for Code Pink or the Daily Show, but even those groups think this is retarded. Random Stupidity? Absolutely. Shame on you, Mr. Kudlow. Shame on you, CNBC. Someone who cries about illegal behavior on Wall Street and in Washington should have no problem adhering to the law. I hope you are prosecuted to the full extent of the law. 6 months in pound-me-in-the-ass prison might be the only way to show Mr. Kudlow what the value of a dollar really is.
I love my country, and its currency.
PC
This is a violation of Title 18, Section 333, of the United States Code. Title 18, Section 333, states: "Whoever mutilates, cuts, defaces, disfigures, or perforates, or unites or cements together, or does any other thing to any bank bill, draft, note, or other evidence of debt issued by any national banking association, or Federal Reserve bank, or the Federal Reserve System, with intent to render such bank bill, draft, note, or other evidence of debt unfit to be reissued, shall be fined under this title or imprisoned not more than six months, or both."
I sent an email to CNBC asking for Mr. Kudlow to at least pay the $100 fine. How arrogant can one man be? To burn a dollar during the peak of the worst recession since the 1930s disgusts me in a way similar to our previous post about Jim Cramer. These CNBC elitists have no idea what the common man is going through in America. Better ways to use that burnt dollar bill? Give it to a homeless person, donate it to charity, even roll it up to enjoy some of the nose candy that Kudlow was once addicted to... CNBC is resorting to classless antics that I thought were only reserved for Code Pink or the Daily Show, but even those groups think this is retarded. Random Stupidity? Absolutely. Shame on you, Mr. Kudlow. Shame on you, CNBC. Someone who cries about illegal behavior on Wall Street and in Washington should have no problem adhering to the law. I hope you are prosecuted to the full extent of the law. 6 months in pound-me-in-the-ass prison might be the only way to show Mr. Kudlow what the value of a dollar really is.
I love my country, and its currency.
PC
Friday, March 13, 2009
Jon Stewart vs Jim Cramer
Please watch Jon Stewart mop the floor with Jim Cramer...
Random Stupidity?
Yes.
Corruption will continue to provide us with fantastic material.
BTW, Check out AOT's song
United Banks of America (52 Week Low Mix)
to get our take on the problems plaguing the banks.
May Gears bless us,
and the may Gears bless the
United Banks of America!
PC
Random Stupidity?
Yes.
Corruption will continue to provide us with fantastic material.
BTW, Check out AOT's song
United Banks of America (52 Week Low Mix)
to get our take on the problems plaguing the banks.
May Gears bless us,
and the may Gears bless the
United Banks of America!
PC
Saturday, February 21, 2009
United Banks of America (52WeekLowMix)
Greetings,
As you all know, we are in the worst recession since 1937.
The situation is dire.
Banks are trading for less than Starbucks.
AOT has rushed here to save the financial system.
Our plan will follow in the coming weeks.
We are still hammering out most of the details.
Let me assure you, this new plan is good.
It's just not done yet.
So we'll get back to you when it is done.
In the meantime, please listen to our new song:
United Banks of America (52 Week Low Mix)
We have provided an approximation of the lyrics:
I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United Banks of America
Fannie, Freddie, AIG
Where do they get the authority?
Wells Fargo, Bank of America
JP Morgan Stanley and Chase
WAMU, Countrywide, IndyMac
OH NO!
It's the Super Lehman Brothers
Riding on the back of the Meryll Lynch bull
Bear Stearns knocked the bull on its ass
shorting stocks like Douglas Kass
Whenever I make money, somebody loses money!
SRS
SKF
SSG
QID
SDS
DXD
If I'm gonna make money, somebody loses money!
I want a million dollars
You want a million dollars
Let's spend a trillion dollars
OH NO!
Pelosi, Reed and Barney Frank
Love the Fed more than you and me
George Bush and Henry Paulson
spent all our currency
The former head of the New York Fed is now in charge of the IRS
Tim Geithner takes your taxes
but he doesn't pay his own
you don't need an RTC
all you need is AOT
Peaceful Resolution
Peaceful Revolution
a revolution without dancing is not a revolution worth having.
This ain't a bad bank
it's a citi bank
this aint a bad bank
it's a shitty bank
SRS
SKF
SSG
QID
SDS
DXD
I only make money, if someone loses money!
------------------------------------------------------------
We can only hope this will create a more open dialogue about what is really going on in the world economy.
PC
As you all know, we are in the worst recession since 1937.
The situation is dire.
Banks are trading for less than Starbucks.
AOT has rushed here to save the financial system.
Our plan will follow in the coming weeks.
We are still hammering out most of the details.
Let me assure you, this new plan is good.
It's just not done yet.
So we'll get back to you when it is done.
In the meantime, please listen to our new song:
United Banks of America (52 Week Low Mix)
We have provided an approximation of the lyrics:
I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United Banks of America
Fannie, Freddie, AIG
Where do they get the authority?
Wells Fargo, Bank of America
JP Morgan Stanley and Chase
WAMU, Countrywide, IndyMac
OH NO!
It's the Super Lehman Brothers
Riding on the back of the Meryll Lynch bull
Bear Stearns knocked the bull on its ass
shorting stocks like Douglas Kass
Whenever I make money, somebody loses money!
SRS
SKF
SSG
QID
SDS
DXD
If I'm gonna make money, somebody loses money!
I want a million dollars
You want a million dollars
Let's spend a trillion dollars
OH NO!
Pelosi, Reed and Barney Frank
Love the Fed more than you and me
George Bush and Henry Paulson
spent all our currency
The former head of the New York Fed is now in charge of the IRS
Tim Geithner takes your taxes
but he doesn't pay his own
you don't need an RTC
all you need is AOT
Peaceful Resolution
Peaceful Revolution
a revolution without dancing is not a revolution worth having.
This ain't a bad bank
it's a citi bank
this aint a bad bank
it's a shitty bank
SRS
SKF
SSG
QID
SDS
DXD
I only make money, if someone loses money!
------------------------------------------------------------
We can only hope this will create a more open dialogue about what is really going on in the world economy.
PC
Thursday, February 19, 2009
GBFMYC
Give Us Back Our Fucking Money You Cunts, brought to you by dontpaniconline.com
At least the global financial shitstorm is allowing for some comedy...
PC
At least the global financial shitstorm is allowing for some comedy...
PC
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
China's Next Top Mistress
Just when we think we are done talking about China, a friend sends us this story...
Source: CNN
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
"BEIJING, China (CNN) -- A married Chinese businessman who could no longer afford five mistresses held a competition to decide which one to keep.
But the contest took a fatal turn when one of the women, eliminated for her looks, drove the man and the four other competitors off a cliff, Chinese media reported.
The spurned mistress died and the other passengers were injured, the reports said.
Police initially thought the car had plummeted off a mountain road in eastern China on December 6 by accident. Then they learned of the contest through a letter the dead woman had left behind, the Shanghai Daily newspaper said.
The 29-year-old woman, identified only as Yu, was a waitress when she met the businessman at a restaurant in the coastal city of Qingdao in 2000.
At the time, the businessman, identified only by his last name -- Fan -- was married and had four other mistresses, according to the Peninsula Metropolis Daily newspaper in Qingdao.
The women knew of one another, but none elected to break up with the man and give up their rent-free apartment and a 5,000 yuan ($730) monthly allowance, the reports said.
When the economy soured, the businessman apparently decided to let go of all but one mistress.
He staged a private talent show in May, without telling the women his intentions. An instructor from a local modeling agency judged the women on the way they looked, how they sang and how much alcohol they could hold, the Shanghai Daily said.
The judge knocked out Yu in the first round of the competition based on her looks. Angry, she decided to exact revenge by telling her lover and the four other women to accompany her on a sightseeing trip before she returned to her home province, the media reports said.
It was during the trip that Yu reportedly drove the car off the cliff.
Fan shut down his company after the crash and paid Yu's parents 580,000 yuan ($84,744) as compensation for her death.
The four other women left him, as did his wife when she learned of the affairs."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
You just gotta love the three categories of the competition:
Looks: How can you have a mistress if she isn't hot?
Singing Ability: A mistress has to be able to frequent a karaoke bar and hold it down.
Alcohol Tolerance: Now this one is tricky, as most hot, Asian women are skinny and have problems metabolizing their booze. Still, a man has to have his priorities.
Now the last point I will make: Who gets in a car with a girl whose life you just ruined? Especially with the other women you rejected her to be with. Mr. Fan exhibited a fine example of random stupidity, which will be forever immortalized in our blog.
Kudos to China, we will keep eating this crazy shit up...
PC
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Dan Deacon - Crystal Cat
From half of the guys that brought you Mister Ballonhands,
It's Crystal Cat!
Random Stupidity indeed,
PC
It's Crystal Cat!
Random Stupidity indeed,
PC
Friday, February 13, 2009
I thought you were a rocket scientist!
Source Journal Times
"The thumbs down in the we-knew-it-had-to-happen-sooner-or-later category occurred this week 500 miles over Siberia: the first recorded space collision between two satellites. According to news reports, a working U.S. Iridium satellite on contract for commercial and Department of Defense work plowed into a one-ton defunct Soviet military satellite. The collision spewed space debris over 300 to 800 miles and could pose a danger to other satellites. Perhaps even more predictable than the crash was the response from the Soviets, who suggested NASA and Iridium could have avoided the crash by adjusting its orbit. “It could have been a computer failure or a human error,” a Soviet space expert said, “It also could be that they were only paying attention to smaller debris and ignoring the defunct satellites.” Why don’t you watch where you’re going with that heap of junk? No tickets were issued."
Gotta love those cold-blooded Russians, and wow, if you needed to know that Motorola was hurting there you go...
PC
"The thumbs down in the we-knew-it-had-to-happen-sooner-or-later category occurred this week 500 miles over Siberia: the first recorded space collision between two satellites. According to news reports, a working U.S. Iridium satellite on contract for commercial and Department of Defense work plowed into a one-ton defunct Soviet military satellite. The collision spewed space debris over 300 to 800 miles and could pose a danger to other satellites. Perhaps even more predictable than the crash was the response from the Soviets, who suggested NASA and Iridium could have avoided the crash by adjusting its orbit. “It could have been a computer failure or a human error,” a Soviet space expert said, “It also could be that they were only paying attention to smaller debris and ignoring the defunct satellites.” Why don’t you watch where you’re going with that heap of junk? No tickets were issued."
Gotta love those cold-blooded Russians, and wow, if you needed to know that Motorola was hurting there you go...
PC
Happy Birthday to Me.
I am 28, and I gotta say that last year felt like 30 years... The older I get, the more responsibilities I face. I am grateful to the giant donut in the sky for giving me all the opportunity to succeed and live in a country with 24 hour drive thru hamburger joints. I thank the giant donut in the sky for all Cleveland sports, for the University of Michigan, for WRA, CCDS, and all other things that have formed who I am. I will continue to make electronic music as it is my religion to do so. Thank you giant donut for saving me in 2006 when I had my near fatal car accident.
And Thanks to all my readers, friends, family and Earl Divx...
PC
And Thanks to all my readers, friends, family and Earl Divx...
PC
Friday, February 06, 2009
Wednesday, February 04, 2009
Away Messages (an infinite series)
Only a married guy could have this away message:
"Thanks Obama for signing the Womens Equal pay bill which allows stupid bitches that I choose to fire to sue me 5 or more years after the fact for no reason.. You're a friggin asshole. Thankfully tort lawyers will continue to rake in the dough screwing us as always"
Where to start with why this is wrong? How about lumping all women as "stupid bitches?" Or perhaps the fact that this guy barely employs any women to begin with. It is one thing to disagree with policy, but to blindly spit out hate is exactly what is wrong with the direction of this country.
If you want to voice an intelligent opinion about politics check out our new blog...
www.ifyouwantmyvote.com
PC
"Thanks Obama for signing the Womens Equal pay bill which allows stupid bitches that I choose to fire to sue me 5 or more years after the fact for no reason.. You're a friggin asshole. Thankfully tort lawyers will continue to rake in the dough screwing us as always"
Where to start with why this is wrong? How about lumping all women as "stupid bitches?" Or perhaps the fact that this guy barely employs any women to begin with. It is one thing to disagree with policy, but to blindly spit out hate is exactly what is wrong with the direction of this country.
If you want to voice an intelligent opinion about politics check out our new blog...
www.ifyouwantmyvote.com
PC
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Monday, January 26, 2009
Technology Wars: Happy Anniversary Mac!
In honor of the 25th anniversary of Macintosh computers by Apple, I thought I would post some blasts from the past by our favorite titans of industry, Steve Jobs and Bill Gates.
First the Apple Hype Machine's 1984 Ad at the Superbowl...
Steve Unveils the Mac
Bill Gates loves it!
I am sure glad 1984 wasn't like 1984, too bad 2009 is looking like it.
Techno Sucks
PC
First the Apple Hype Machine's 1984 Ad at the Superbowl...
Steve Unveils the Mac
Bill Gates loves it!
I am sure glad 1984 wasn't like 1984, too bad 2009 is looking like it.
Techno Sucks
PC
Friday, January 16, 2009
Deflation, Inflation, Oil, and Spacebucks
So we obviously are in the worst recession since Jesus led a hummus strike in Palestine. While playing Gears of War 2 last night, a problem arose. My friend did not have the new "combustible map pack." We suggested that he buy them with his xbox live points. He pointed out that his points were on his other account and that he didn't know if they could be transferred or traded to his present account. This lead us to a revelation. We should created a currency market for videogame points. The Spacebucks exchange would be a place where wii, xbox and ps3 "spacebucks" could be traded in exchange for each other as well as US Dollars. If we could take out insurance on the value our spacebucks, we could hedge against inflation or deflation (even finance home purchases.) This market would be obviously more transparent than any other financial market. As a result of the transparency, spacebucks would be worth more than the US Dollar relative to the videogame currencies. Also, we may as well throw a conversion rate for WoW gold and CnC Tiberium to spacebucks as well. So right now, the $10 gets you 800 xbox points, well 7 spacebucks would get the same amount. Seems like a no brainer. The dollar will ultimately crash, but spacebucks will have the same purchasing power, a win win for the gamers and the game companies. We could start buying actual commodities in spacebucks, a stable currency would create less volatility in the actual gold and oil markets. Lastly, the money supplies can be controlled by the central banks of Nintendo and Microsoft. Sony's damn near insolvent, so they would be a lot like the Iceland of the spacebucks exchange. Videogame companies have less debt than the federal reserve and the central banks across the world, so this could lead to broader stability in the markets. So let us write to congress as well as our facefudge pals, our mayonnaisespace compatriots, and twitter our way out of this recession. May Gears bless us, and may Gears bless this United Spacebucks of America.
www.technosucks.com
PC
www.technosucks.com
PC
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